Thrifty Tulip #3

You know what makes me happy? Big things. Like paying off my credit cards. And my rent. And buying groceries for the week. And 100% of the things that actually open the door to making me happy absolutely are depended on this thing called "money." And for all the quotations and cliches and sayings - - - I've never been able to be happy while not knowing how I'm going to buy my meals the next day.

All the cutesy text messages and smiling babies and freshly-cut grass won't pay the rent.

Little things, though, they help. Like cigarettes and the way they crackle in the rain. And the when my lips burn a little when I take a sip of whiskey. And Cheetos, how they make my fingers orange.

(blasphemy! what about sunshine and daisies and kittens!)

But art bores me.
And love can be fleeting.
And you start to look at autumn leaves as nothing more than slowly-decaying trees.

I hate cartoons
and chocolate
and clowns.

But the way my hair smells when I buy fancy new shampoo?
And Egyptian cotton sheets,
oh, and the little flip phones that are super-skinny?

It's real, and it's true, and it's honest.
(and it makes me kind of happy too).